Saw a dead body today…

…talk about adventure.

I wish I could have closed my eyes and not seen anything. BUT.. I did. And you guys are going to get my visual. Strap in, it was traumatic to me.

As I was headed to the post office, (much like I do any other day), jamie005HWY 27 was blocked off by about 27 cars and trucks. It was imperative that you drive thru the 2 oncoming lanes of traffic to avoid this catastrophe. Approaching the scene, cars blocked visually the accident. I thought the little diner was on fire. SERIOUSLY! There were fire trucks and only one ambulance. (Picture to the right is the only news on it so far and it’s on the FHP website as a call out… Fatal. Well, no kidding.

As I got closer and started thru the traffic squeeze, I saw large plastic tarps being held up by a young woman who looked quite pale. My eyes focused on the single tire that had been ripped from the car by the axle and broken in half that was in the middle lane. Panic came over my face and I looked up just as the curtain blew back from the wind to expose 2 dead people lying in the street. I saw them. I cannot give details as to what happened in the accident as I was traumatically flustered with a panic attack.

I saw a smashed vehicle, but I can’t tell you what color is was. It too had a matching tarp covering it.

Irrational fear is hard to explain to someone that doesn’t share your view.

I have a fear of Dead Bodies. This is No Shit… I can’t make this stuff up.

While speaking to my mother today about it and her calming me down, she tried to find the source of the fear. She said that it more than likely started when I was three. Check out this story that I can remember like it was yesterday:

I was 3 and my mom took us to the laundromat to do laundry. My brother (he was 7 or 8) was pushing me in one of the rolling carts. As my mother (I’m sure) told us to stop,  I wandered outside the door and found a man that had face planted the cement. Blood ran from his face and trickled a dark red into the gutter. He couldn’t move and I was struck with fear in not knowing what to do. Even in my little brain, I knew something was wrong. 

My mother protected us and just gathered her things and took us from the place. I have no closure knowing whether or not the guy lived. 

Since then, seeing a guy dying in front of me has sunk into my brain and given me the fear of death and dying and dead people. I can’t do it. I hyperventilate. 

Irrational fear is just that … irrational. Doesn’t make sense and everything else just stops. I hope that I get to experience irrational fear with J. Lemme rephrase: I hope he has some irrational fear that I get to place judgment on. He made me feel small and stupid.

It’s not something I can explain, but it’s real to me.

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Wow. Just wow…

I say that when all I can do is shake my head. I have to say I’ve been shaking my head a lot. Just… wow.

Let’s face it. Idiots are everywhere.. but without idiots, how would we get the answers to questions that we are afraid to ask ourselves?

Before I start my rant… let me back up and explain to you where it began and where my breaking point was…

I love yahoo news. I don’t know why exactly, but I do. I love clicking the right button and scrolling through all of the little pictures and seeing what captions they can put under them in order to make them ‘must click news’. I’ve heard all about the Kardashians, the 5 things you just don’t say to guys, who got the longest pass in the football game the night before, who Simon Cowell impregnated, what to do to improve your house, what you shouldn’t do to improve your house, what jobs are poppin’ for new graduates…. you name it.. they’ve talked about it. And as much as they have talked about it.. so have I. I use it to break odd silences in car rides and to make myself sound like I know what I’m talking about.

I think I honestly got interested in what Yahoo! news had to say about 5 years ago when I thought I had found the end of the internet and nothing else was interesting. I mean seriously, how much p0rn can one person look at? Yes, there are places out there that have nothing to do with that, but I honestly had lost interest in the internet. I was tired of ‘chatting’ with people on messengers. I was tired of just looking through the same ol’ email.. I was tired of signing up for things and then being bombarded with multiple spams in my inbox telling me to buy this, look at that, sign up for this.. send me money here… So I stopped everything and opened Yahoo. Now I have to say, this is before I found pinterest or stumbleupon. I just looked at the front page of Yahoo and was in awe. Look at all that mess… (i shook my head)

I started to click links. I knew there had to be more to the internet than vast lands of coupons and online shopping (ebay & bidz) I needed something to catch my attention. Enter stage left: the yahoo headlines.  I clicked a picture with an interesting tag line and low and behold… I could comment on the article that was written.. just like all these other people that had something to say. 

I enjoy what some people have to say and in my head, I’m like: hell yeah.. couldn’t have said it better myself. Then.. there are those that comment on the article only to be irritating or mean to other people with opinions or questions. Those kind of people really put a kink in my herringbone.

A ‘how to’ article on hair color had a reader comment with a question that asked what dye was used in order to create the colors to tip on the hair. I was thinking the same thing!! I was like, seriously.. what dye for the hair is green, purple, pink, red, orange… so I can make my hair those pretty rainbowish colors??? And while looking for an answer from the instructor, I see a reply to the comment that reads: “I hate idiots!! It’s hair dye, stupid!!!” 

As I thought for a second, and said to myself, wow.. harsh. Then as if my screen to my computer was talking to me, I answered with a verbal — NU UH!! I’ve not seen those colors anywhere other than in Splat hair stain.. and this was supposed to be home remedies. I immediately got irritated at the comment. Did I reply? No. I didn’t stoop to that level of ignorance. 

Point to my blog? Everyone has a right to speak their mind, comment how they want, and question what they want to question without judgment of what other people think.  Now I can see it from the other side too.. those people also have the right to comment, question and speak their mind however they want… HOWEVER!!!!! The people that post questions are in fact people. Rude people should be rude on their own time. 

In the words of Thumper’s mom on Bambi: If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nuthin’ at all.